Who Gets Yolie?
by Sarzana
Summary: Oh crap... Another stupid fic. Here, Izzy, Ken, and TK fight over Yolie in more extremely stupid contests. Probably about as funny as the other two. I'd like to see the opinion of anybody who bothers to read this, so please review! Thank you for your time


Who Gets Yolie?  
  
By popular demand! TK, Ken, and Koushiro fight over Yolie. Same plot as the other two stories I wrote. As always, I don't own Digimon. (I've got to think of a more creative disclaimer. Maybe a Disclaimer Song...) Thanks to everyone who reviewed the "Who Gets Yamato?" and "Who Gets Kari?" stories. I really didn't expect much of a response! And sorry to all the Matt fans who are annoyed that they didn't get Matt. I thought that was the best coupling for him. Also, sorry to all Mimato and Mimun fans. And sorry to anyone offended by the "Tell Why Soccer Sucks in Ten Words or Less" round and TK saying that basketball will rule the world. That is not my opinion, I just thought it would be TK's opinion. And sorry to everyone who hates Daikari or loves Takari or Kenkari or any other pairing with Kari. I'm sorry if you like yaoi or yuri and I didn't put it in my fics. I'm sorry if you think Willis or Michael or any other characters make a better match for Yolie. Finally, sorry to all Ken fans who are reading this fic. He seems to be a bit mean here. I'm sorry! It's just happening! I have no control over what happens in my stories! Let's see, is that all the people I've offended with my fics? I think so. Well, I hope you like my fic. Keep in mind it's just for fun and I don't mean to offend anybody. Now on with the stupidity!  
  
***  
  
Susannah the Fanfic Author sat in her spinny office chair thinking of a way to capture three Digidestined and continue her story series. She had already used a big net and just transporting them there. Dang. She flipped through her book of Evil Author Tricks. Two geniuses and a kid with a weird hat (sorry to all fans of TK's hat). She checked the index. Nope. There was nothing for that odd combination. Obviously, she had to think of something herself.  
  
***  
  
Meanwhile, the three boys were arguing (ooh, original) outside the school.  
  
"Obviously she loves me. You saw her in the first episode, how she looked at me and called me legendary!" said Koushiro.  
  
"Yeah, but in the Samurai of Sincerity, she said I was really cool! Besides, I'm the only available one in the current Digidestined that isn't a stick-toting midget!" (Sorry to all Cody fans! Also sorry to all Ken fans who think Ken should be classified as a Digidestined. TK tends to have a lot of questionable opinions in my fics. Don't ask me why, it just seems to happen!) TK responded.  
  
Ken, who was walking far behind the two arguing boys, sneered to himself. "I know Yolie loves me." Suddenly, he got an idea.  
  
"Hey, Author!" he yelled.  
  
"What? I'm still trying to think of an evil plot to trap... Oh, it's you. Never mind. What is it?"  
  
"Do another of your fics to see which one of us gets Yolie or I'll have Stingmon hurt you and I'll mess up your E-Mail account!"  
  
"Okay, okay. Thank you for saving me some thinking!"  
  
All three of the boys, as well as the author, were transported to the infamous arena where the other two fics were held. As you might have guessed, the walls were plastered with pictures of Yolie.  
  
"All right, let's make this quick," Ken snapped.  
  
"Uh, yeah. You all know the drill, right? The first round is trivia. The two who score the highest get to go on to the next few rounds, which consist of random activities that I make up along the way. Ready for the first round?"  
  
Three podiums, each with a big red button on it, popped up in front of the three boys.  
  
"The first question is: Who does Hawkmon DNA Digivolve with?"  
  
BUZZZZZZZZZ! (I need something more interesting than just "BUZZ". Hmmm, how about...)  
  
SKREEEEEEEEEE!  
  
"WHAT WAS THAT?!?!?!!!" yelled the three boys at once.  
  
"Umm, that was the leftover sound clip of Jun playing Matt's band's song."  
  
"Oh."  
  
"How about this?"  
  
TWEEEEEEEEET!  
  
"No."  
  
"This?"  
  
DIGIARMOR ENERGIZE!!!  
  
"No!"  
  
I WANNA BE THE VERY BEST, LIKE NO ONE EVER WAS! TO CATCH THEM IS MY REAL TEST; TO TRAIN THEM IS MY CAUSE! POKEMON!  
  
"NO! Nononononononononononono!"  
  
"What do you want?"  
  
"Just have it play the Digimon theme or something!" cried Izzy.  
  
DIGIMON, DIGITAL MONSTERS! DIGIMON ARE THE CHAMPIONS!  
  
"No, that's too much to type. Oh, well. This is getting old. How about this: the first person to hit the buzzer gets to choose the sound?"  
  
BUZZZZZZZ! "JUST HAVE IT BUZZ LIKE ANY NORMAL PERSON WOULD, YOU TWIT!" all three boys screamed at the top of their lungs in unison.  
  
"Okay, we'll just use boring buzzers. But if I don't get any reviews, I'm blaming you guys for being so boring!"  
  
All three boys sweatdropped.  
  
"Okay, who hit the buzzer in the first place, anyway?"  
  
The boys fell over in a fake anime faint.  
  
"Oh, well. New question, then. What is Hawkmon's DNA Digivolved form?"  
  
TWEEEEEEET!  
  
The Author sweatdropped. "Sorry about that."  
  
"The answer is Sylphimon!" said Ken.  
  
"Yeah, that's right. Next: Who did Yolie inherit her Digiegg of Sincerity from?"  
  
BUZZZZZZZZ!  
  
Everyone cheered.  
  
"Mimi!" TK called out.  
  
"That's correct! Next question is: When did Yolie see her first Digimon?"  
  
BUZZZZZZZZ! "During the battle with Diaboromon!" Izzy answered.  
  
"Okay, once again, everyone is tied. The next two questions determine who goes on to the next round. What was Yolie's favorite word in the first few episodes?"  
  
BUZZZZZZZZ! "Perfecto!" said all three boys at once.  
  
The author sweatdropped. That was the first time that happened.  
  
"Okaay, on to the next question. Who was with Yolie when she found her first Digiegg?"  
  
BUZZZZZZZZ! "Izzy, Cody, and Sora," said Ken.  
  
Again, the author sweatdropped. "You spend way too much time on the Internet, Ken," she remarked. "All right, now for the final question. In the first episode, when Yolie said she would fix Cody's computer, what did Cody say they were having for dinner?"  
  
Everyone stared at the Author. She sweatdropped. "What? I couldn't think of anything better!"  
  
BUZZZZZZZZ! "Macaroni and cheese!" said TK.  
  
"That's right! Sorry, Izzy. You've still got your laptop. You also won a blue bandana, a Yolie plushie, and an autographed picture." (Dang, these prizes are all basically the same. In the next story, if there is one, I'm also going to have to think of more creative prizes.)  
  
Izzy then disappeared, muttering about how all his fans were going to flame the Author to death as soon as they read this.  
  
"Oh, that's right." Susannah snapped her fingers and her clothes changed to a flameproof suit. "Hah! Okay, the next round will be..." She once again thumbed through her book of Evil Author Tricks. "Okay, you will have to climb a rope while being pummeled with large spiders from all directions."  
  
TK fell over in fake anime faints, while Ken began laughing maniacally.  
  
"They all said I was crazy to buy the spider-proof clothes! Well, I'll show them!"  
  
The author sweatdropped. "Okay, who wants to go first?"  
  
"Of course I will!" said Ken. He dashed over to the rope hanging from the ceiling.  
  
"Where'd that rope come from?" asked TK.  
  
"Don't ask."  
  
"Okay."  
  
Meanwhile, Ken grabbed hold of the rope and began to climb furiously. As he climbed, huge spiders about three inches in diameter bounced off his clothes. He reached the top and touched the ceiling, then slid down the rope.  
  
"Okay, that took 8.29 seconds, and I'd give that a nine."  
  
Ken gave Susannah a Death Glare.  
  
"Aah, make that ten."  
  
Ken grinned.  
  
"TK's turn now."  
  
TK approached the rope. He took a deep breath and began to climb. Large spiders bounced off his hat as he furiously made his way to the top.  
  
"Owwwww!" TK cried as a particularly large spider hit him in the eye. He fell down to the padded floor below.  
  
"Okay, you almost made it to the top. Arbitrarily, I'm giving you a four."  
  
TK stood up, grumbling about how he really should be with Kari.  
  
"For the next event, we have Control Spire Climbing!"  
  
"Again with the climbing? This is getting ridiculous," said TK.  
  
Ken thought, "Why didn't I equip the Control Spires with footholds?"  
  
"TK can go first this time," said the Author.  
  
TK walked up to the Control Spire, grabbed hold of it, and quickly climbed up to the top. He touched the point at the top and then fell down on his rear.  
  
"Wow... I'd give that a nine. That was perfect except for the dismount. Ken's turn."  
  
Ken walked up to the Control Spire and surveyed it. Then he yelled, "Hey, Wormmon!"  
  
The little Digimon crawled up to Ken.  
  
"Yes, Ken?"  
  
Ken whispered into Wormmon's ear. The little green creature nodded. Ken picked him up and tossed him to the top of the Control Spire, and he grabbed on. Wormmon then sent a thread down to Ken, who grabbed it and walked up the side of the control spire.  
  
"Hey, that's cheating!" said TK.  
  
"Uh, it would be, but I don't really have any written rules."  
  
TK proceeded to strangle the Author.  
  
When TK finally let the Author go, she gasped for air and said, "That would be a seven. That leaves TK with thirteen and Ken with seventeen. For the final round, we will pretty much ditch these scores and whoever wins the round gets Yolie."  
  
The author again picked up her book of Evil Author Tricks. (Dang that's overused.) However, Ken snatched it and tossed it to the top of the Control Spire, where Wormmon held it.  
  
"Why you!" Susannah prepared to use here strongest, meanest Author Trick when Ken smiled smugly and shook his head.  
  
"You should know better. Control Spires work against Author Magic."  
  
The Author sweatdropped.  
  
"We are going to have a fair last round this time. Let's bring in Yolie to score for a change."  
  
Yolie suddenly appeared.  
  
"How'd I get here?" Her eyes turned into little hearts. "Ken-chan!"  
  
TK, Ken, and the Author sweatdropped.  
  
"Sorry, but we have to do one more round for this!"  
  
"And why?" asked Ken.  
  
"Aah, because so far the fic has been really stupid and maybe one more round will make it the slightest bit funny," the Author replied.  
  
"Okay, so what are we going to do?" asked TK.  
  
"Hmmmm..." She thought about this for a moment, then decided...  
  
"We'll play Quidditch!"  
  
"Can you be a bit less blatant next time when ripping off somebody else's material?" asked Ken.  
  
"You didn't let me finish. You will each be on a broomstick, and you have to try and catch Yolie's bandana while we throw (ummm...) gumballs at you!"  
  
Ken sweatdropped. "Well I guess it could be worse..."  
  
Taking this opportunity, Susannah walked over to Wormmon. "Hey Wormmon, I'll give you a twenty-percent raise if you knock over that Control Spire."  
  
"Make it thirty percent and you have a deal," the Digimon replied.  
  
"Great! Now hurry!"  
  
Wormmon hopped off the top of the Control Spire and hit it at a point on its base with his claw. The Control Spire immediately crumbled.  
  
"You've got to hit it in just the right spot," said Wormmon as Susannah sweatdropped.  
  
"HAHAHA! The Control Spire is down, so I have my powers back!" the Author yelled as lightning bolts crashed behind her.  
  
"Oh crap," said TK and Ken.  
  
Two broomsticks appeared, and Ken and TK quite willingly hopped on, seeing the maniacal look in the Author's eyes.  
  
"The rules are simple. Ride around on the broomsticks, avoiding the airborne gumballs. The one who catches Yolie's bandana wins and everybody can go home. Ready?"  
  
The boys nodded quickly.  
  
"GO!"  
  
Yolie tossed her bandana in the air as the boys lifted off.  
  
"Now for the fun part!" the Author said, smiling cruelly.  
  
Yolie and Susannah pelted the two with multicolored gumballs. One hit Ken in the head and he almost fell off. Another hit TK's hat, and it fell to the ground.  
  
"NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!" cried TK. (Sorry, I really abuse TK's hat, don't I?)  
  
Ken moved in for the bandana, but a gumball hit him in the forehead.  
  
"WHAT IS WITH THIS GAME, ANYWAY?!?!?!?!!!"  
  
The Author pretended not to hear him.  
  
TK used this to his advantage and was about to grab the bandana when...  
  
"OH NO YOU DON'T!" yelled Yolie as she hurled a gumball at TK's head. (Sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry to all Miyakeru fans!!!)  
  
"Owwww..." said TK.  
  
Ken reached out and grabbed the bandana.  
  
"Yaaayyyy!" yelled Yolie. She ran up to Ken as he landed and hugged him so hard that she suffocated him.  
  
"Maybe... maybe this wasn't such a good idea..." Ken gasped.  
  
Yolie dragged Ken off back into the Anime world. TK and Susannah cheered.  
  
"Okay, time to go TK. If you're nice, in a future fic I might give you a clone of Kari."  
  
TK obediently dashed after Yolie and Ken.  
  
  
***  
  
As I look back on this, I realize it's total crap. I probably ruined my reputation by putting a common and popular couple in one of my stories. Oh, well. It's still no better than the other two. I'm sorry if I offended anyone in the categories listed at the top, in the story, or not listed. I'm sorry if I wasted your time by posting this and tempting you to read it. If you've made it this far, then you should seek professional help. Thanks anyway for reading, and please review so I can see if anybody actually reads these things. Thanks again!  
  
Sarzana aka Susannah  



End file.
